in case

if you are going to fall in love with me, it’s only fair that you know what you are falling in love with.

you are falling in love with my insecurities and my obsession to look mature and how it always fails. you are falling in love with my immaturities, my constant distraction with shiny objects and colorful things and my overbearing love for stuffed animals, my confused tear ducts that react to the wrong things, my tendency to be too clingy and how i’m a hopeless romantic at heart. how i fall for old movies and even older books and how i appreciate the cliche lines from passages long forgotten. you will fall in love with my mood swings and my ability to start a pointless fight simply because I can get away with it, my bad temper and my impatience. you’re falling for my invented games and my bluntness. you will fall in love with my troubled past and my hopes and dreams no matter how serious of childish (mostly childish) they may be. you are falling in love with how i was brought up and how i will always have an early curfew no matter how much i ask for an extension. if you fall in love with me, you will fall in love with my love-hate relationship with food, my whining and all my imperfections. my inability to apply myself physically, my awkwardness with my body, my bad balance and my incapability to run. you will be falling in love with all my imperfections and my perception that i am never good enough. you will fall in love with how i feel giddy over Brandon Boyd or Liam Connery and how I always have to watch certain shows you hate. if you fall for me, you fall in love with my inability to cook good food and my incompetence in household chores.

 

but you are also falling in love with the way my eyes will smile when im with you, the way i’ll text you at random hours just to tell you how much i love you. you’re falling in love with the occasional humorous things i say, and the way i blush when people talk to me about you or when you compliment me. you are falling for the way i always tear up when you leave or i leave, never getting used to the idea of being apart, the way i will embrace vanity to look good for you. the way i will always want to hug you or hold your hand in public so the world can see im your girl and how lucky i am, the way i will always come up with stupendous ideas to surprise you. you are falling in love with the way i will admit my mistakes as i make them and how i will always say sorry. you are falling in love with my hopes and dreams, big or small, because i hope to achieve them with you. you are falling for the way i bravely face failure and accept nothing less than perfect. you are also falling for the fact that i will always be yours no matter what. you are falling for the way i will try my hardest to understand the chemistry of mixing ingredients so i can cook for you. you are falling for my madness and my laughter and my ideas that always seem so random. you are falling for my whirlwind of emotions and how you know i can always take you places with the words that escape my lips. you are falling in love with my love for reading to you or telling you stories and how my lips always run away with themselves. you are falling for forehead kisses and how i’ll always have a smile in my pocket for when you have a bad day.

if you are going to fall in love with me, you are falling in love with the idea of forever, because i’m an old person in a young body and i take relationships seriously. you are falling in love with talking and working things our and the importance of conversations and debates. you are falling in love with compromises and respect. if you fall in love with me, you fall for all of this

 

too much, but i promise, it will be worth it.

 

xoxo, trish

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